Ever since I had my twins … identical twin girls, by the way, they’ve garnered loads of unwanted attention. People have gone out of their way, whether I’ve authorized it or not,

to give them free stuff

Not one to look gift horses (or people) in the mouth, I’ve tried to graciously allow my girls to accept these gifts while at the same time, trying to explain to their 7-year-older brother he doesn’t get jack from these perfect strangers.

Now this isn’t a singular occurrence. Not a bit. This happens every few months it seems. Somewhere … at some time … by someone … they just must give something to my girls.

One time it was a stuffed animal to which I’d said to my girls, ‘No’ about 100 times and the cashier pulled out $10 from HIS WALLET and paid for two of them.

O_O

As we prepped for birthday celebrations, including a dozen helium balloons, cupcakes for the b-day day at school, cake, etc, and we’re walking out of the grocery store, parcels in-hand, trying to avoid the cars coming from the right since one of my girls is covered in balloons, this is the conversation that I had:

Man 1: “Hey! Is it your birthday?”

We turn around, both girls smiling and saying, ‘yes!”

Man 1: “Did you get ice cream?”

Here I’m thinking there was an ice cream booth or something we missed.

Girls in tandem: “No!” and insert even more big smiles.

Man 2: “Well, go get some for your birthday!”

Here I’m thinking, huh? Where? So rather than continue to look stupid, I say, “Ice cream?” because that is the most eloquent thing I could come up with.

Man 1: “Yeah, pick out whatever you want.” This guy, by the way, is dressed in brown – like he’s a head honcho

Me: “Um …” still, totally eloquent, but stunned again at this offer of free stuff, but I didn’t see a samples cart

Man 2: “Just pick it out from the case.” Clearly he can tell I’m confused.

Me: In silence: In the case? Luckily, my head kicked in, because I’m still standing there with my cart and bags, 30 feet from my van even. “From the case?”

Man 1: “Yeah, I like giving away his {man 2s} stuff.”

Man 2: Smiles. “Pick anything you want.”

Me: “Just go back to the case and pick like one of those small Ben and Jerry singles?”

Man 2: “Anything you want. Anything they want.”

Me: Stunned

Man 1: “And have an awesome birthday! everyone needs ice cream on their birthday!” and he walks away.

Man 2: “If anyone says anything, just let them know Scott said it was fine.”

So … at this point the girls are jumping and cheering and wanting MORE ice cream because we did BUY ice cream for the party. So I roll my cart and bagged groceries and all the balloons BACK into the grocery store and walked all the way to the BACK of the store and picked out this:

Two pints of Ben and Jerrys.

For free.

For their birthdays.

Again.

I can’t make this stuff up. Seriously. I can’t.

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